Ever see something that made you stop in your tracks? You weren’t exactly sure what you were seeing, but you knew there was a story behind the image? This weekend I decided to take a drive to Mt. Charleston to get a change of scenery and take a hike in the cooler elevations of Vegas.
As I started ascending up the mountain, something seemed different that I couldn’t put my finger on. It had probably been a year since my last trip to Mt. Charleston. The scenery had a different look, and then a faint odor tickled my nose. Then, it hit me. The small brush that covered the base of the desert mountains were charred. What made me realize that was when I saw a line where the fire had been stopped. The contrast between the burnt brush and the still evergreen bushes met. Clearly something was different. The fire had been put out at that exact point so that it spread no more.
I had forgotten about the 10,000 acre fire near Mt. Charleston in July. I recalled seeing the smoke bellowing over the mountains from my house and hearing about the devastation of the California fires on the news. When the winds shifted in Las Vegas for a couple days, a blanket of smoke hung over the Vegas strip.
My brain is trained, whether I like it or not, to always search for the metaphors. They are the tools of speakers and trainers. What does this fire line mean? How is this like life? Yikes! I was so close I almost walked through my own fire.
To put this fire out, there were professional fire crews who worked tirelessly. It took a lot of concentrated effort to achieve that goal. Eventually the fire was extinguished. When driving, I what caught my eye was seeing the fire line. The exact place where fruition occurred.
Where in your life do you have “reoccurring fires” that never seem to be extinguished? Where do you want to make a change? Relationships? Finances? Speaking skills? For me, lately it has been about money and my relationship with it.
Many people may see me as “successful.” There are as many definitions of success as there are people. I love the perspective Patricia Fripp gave me. “It’s not how much you make; it’s how much you keep.” And “Your money should make more money than you do.” Brilliant.
I’m thankful and appreciative of the business I have. I’m still working on changing some limiting beliefs I created in my youth. My fire line is doing what I love, while working fewer hours and being financially free. I did put in my time of 18-hour days for years on end. I’d now like to focus on more personal time and receive more in abundance.
What I’m striving for is being debt free and having financial freedom. I’m slightly embarrassed to say I’m not where I want to be. As a speaker, one challenge is when we walk off stage, we are unemployed. Though many people think the answer is more money, the truth is…managing what you do have is the first step. Learning to live beneath your means is part of that.
If you follow my articles, you know that I recently paid off a huge business debt I was carrying. Though that was a huge success, that is not where my fire line is…just like battling the fires takes not only the ground attack, but also the helicopters dropping tons of water until the fire is out. Committing to my goal helped turn the boat and head in the right direction; I’m now stepping it up and educating myself more. Though I’ve been through some courses and read some books which have helped immeasurably, last night I started on a Dave Ramsey course at my church called Financial Peace University.
In the first night of this nine-week class, I had some breakthroughs. I got choked up at one point; he struck a chord. Another friend created some affirmations for me that I’m committed to saying each day. I’ve asked the people in my class to keep me accountable for doing my homework. Somehow knowing others are going to keep me accountable motivates me. How about you?
Though I drew a line in the sand that I was going to change my financial situation ten months ago, the fire is still burning. I love what Dave Ramsey said when he talked about changing your financial picture. He said, “We are not in the microwave business, we are in the crockpot business.” Meaning, it takes time. Whatever you want to change in your life, it may have taken years to create the fire; we can’t expect to put it out in an hour. I like the honesty of his statement.
Have you committed to put out the fire in your life? Maybe it’s big. Maybe it’s small. What will the contrast of your fire line look like? It starts with the commitment. Right now I’m somewhere between my commitment line drawn in the sand and the fire line where it is finally put out. I don’t know it all, yet I can see my fire is under control. I still have hiccups but now catch myself much sooner. I can see I’m getting closer to that fire line. The air assault and the ground attack are helping, as well as volunteers who are jumping in.
Notice, too, that nature is always a great example for us. As I drove down the mountain I took some pictures to remind me of this lesson. As you can see, the area looks like a waste land. If you look close you can also see that even though the raging fires were only put out a couple months ago, there are already signs of new growth in that devastated area. Hmmmmm, think about that. What hope could that give you?
Comments?
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getting support is huge for success,and this blog was great for reminding me of that,and also that I like listening to Dave Ramsey. Guess it’s time to start asking for help in the finances as well.
Doing it by myself is not working.
Darren – I really appreciate your honesty. With you being such a public face, it is great that you remind people that you, too, are human and have struggles. Thank you for that.
The past two months have had me working on my fire line. I’m a paper collector. So much paper for so many things! As a member of Toastmasters, I’ve also expanded my paper collection because of all the TM stuff I collect. My husband and I are in the process of moving from a 3 bedroom 3 storey home into a 2 (much smaller) bedroom condo. My responsibility it to get my papers under control – and my need to keep those papers under control as well. As ‘they’ say – put a date on it to make it a goal. Nothing like a legally binding moving date to force me to do that!
You have courage to be publicly accountable and serve as an example to others. Good metaphor! Remember, crockpot, crockpot, crockpot….smile….
Darren, I love that you shared your vulnerability. It speaks much louder about your character then your success to me. We know deep down that life is and can be difficult at times, but when people try and white wash it with three simple steps to nirvana, we know it is a sham. Thanks for being the real deal!!
Darren,
Thank you for this article. I admire your courage and honesty. Every time I think I can see blue sky, something unexpectedly clouds the air again, and I lose hope of ever seeing the end. I will start caring again, and think of you, whenever I become discouraged.
Pat Gibson
Hi Darren – I absolutely love your blog and always find pieces of transferable wisdom in your words. I run a Programme Office and frequenty want to print out a blog and pin it up on our Notice Board because there are insights and considerations that I believe can help people to do LIFE better – not just Public Speaking! Many of the enewsletters I subscribe to have a button on the site you can hit to get a Printer friendly version of the article…..Won’t you add one of these please?!
Darren,
Your transparency about being a human on a learning and growing journey is encouraging to me today as I look out into the future and see that what I want to accomplish is so much a bigger bucket than what I have already accomplished up to now. Hearing that you have some things to mend and that you are committed to doing the tough stuff is inspiring. Even with as much success as you’ve had and so many people testifying to your impact on them, you still have personal challenges and limitations to contend with. I take from that the feeling that, hey, it’s okay that I do, too.
I like that you laid out some key pieces of your plan to move forward: patience (crockpot), accountability (your Dave Ramsey church group), personal commitment and clarity on your intentions (getting choked up means you connected emotionally – a much stronger connection to your intentions than a mind trip alone), and focus (you’ve chosen to concentrate on this financial piece specifically right now).
How does this connect to being a great speaker and making a living as a speaker? Two things in my mind: Anything that tears down how great we feel about ourselves comes across in our presence when on the platform. Sometimes in subtle ways that don’t seem to diminish the presentation. But what most of us want if we are going to plunk down the time and the money to come to one of your programs, is to be fantastic as a speaker – in flow, a light to others, putting our content out there in love and service – not engaged in a public ego trip. Power as a speaker, or let’s call it confidence, comes from belief in what we are saying together with groundedness in who we are – Alignment of self and message. Clarity of and strength in one’s principles and values, together with fully walking the talk – no lip service.
Thanks for modeling all of this, Darren. Just inspired by your honesty and transparency and humanness – I connected. A great article to read to start my day today.
Melissa Gordon, President
EchelonCommunicate, LLC