People say it in different ways. Some use words but have no meaning behind them. Some don’t use words at all but mean it even more. They show it with their actions or with their eyes. What am I talking about? The message: “I love you.”
Sometimes as presenters we are not only teaching new perspectives; we are also professional reminders. We all need reminders of what is important. This week I went to Boston to celebrate Mom and Dad’s 60th wedding anniversary. They are so cute; they still hold hands. They were so happy, and many of their close friends and relatives were there. It was cool to witness.
My parents invited people to come back to their house after the party — and, true to form, Mom and Dad had more food and sweets than people could possibly eat (unless people had stayed for 3 days). One way Mom and Dad say, “I love you” is through food and service. They often live the quote, “It is better to give than to receive.” As presenters, we too are often guilty of getting a giving gene from birth. That, however, is not what this article is about. Mom is not just a great giver; she is an over-giver. She will make sure you walk out the door with a full plate of food. When I popped by Mom and Dad’s house the next day to say goodbye, Mom tried to load me up with even more. She isn’t happy until my arms are full. How about you? Know anyone like my mom?
Honestly, I have to limit my sweets after I leave Mom’s house. I try to take just enough to please her, but I had to learn how to say, “No, thank you.” As you know, moms often hear everything except the word no. Have you ever met people who give, give, and then give some more? That’s my mom.
You’ve also probably known people who take, take, and take some more. Taking can sometimes be perceived as the opposite of giving. What if there is another, even worse, opposite? When Mom was loading me up for the road, I was trying to figure out when I could politely say, “Enough. Thank you!”
Then I remembered a lesson that I had learned at a Peak Potentials seminar. It was a big aha. Think about the quote, “It is better to give than to receive.” It says better; it does not say don’t receive! That is the gene that givers sometimes lack. The receiving gene is important. If we don’t receive, we take away someone else’s opportunity to give. Yikes! If we are obviously put off by someone’s attempt to give, we take away the joy that the giver might have hoped for. Who are we to take away someone’s joy? That can make us a taker!
Even if someone doesn’t understand what we need, like, or want, let’s remember to honor their intention and be better receivers. There will be a time when they won’t be around to nudge us lovingly any longer. Some day we might regret being poor receivers.
It amazes me how often I need a reminder of some important things. How do you say, “I love you?” More importantly, how do those closest to you let you know that they do. Do you notice? Sometimes a nudge may be their attempt to tell you how much they care. Remember, their joy comes from our receiving. Our best gift to them is being a great receiver. I’m working on it.
Thanks, Mom, for the brownies, the sandwich, the 11 bottles of water, and 13 rolls. You rock. I love you, too.
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