Stage Time: Are You Likeable on Stage?

Have you ever seen speakers on stage who, although they weren’t perfect, you couldn’t help liking them anyway? Then again, have you seen presenters who were eloquent and seemingly perfect, but you just didn’t like them at all? What do you think is the difference? There are probably a hundred different reasons for both instances.
This example comes from my being on stage and hosting at my church. Hosts are the people who, in presentation terms, serve as a master of ceremonies. They open and close the service and give the announcements; they do not give the sermon. I was asked to be the host at a service this past weekend. Now, you would think that after twenty years of stage time, I would have been comfortable, but I wasn’t. I was nervous. Speaking about what I know and have studied for years is very different from following a script.
The cool thing is that our church uses a confidence monitor. Ironically, the bad thing is that our church uses a confidence monitor. It is great to have cheat notes, but in my situation it is not good. I get mesmerized by the words and start reading. Because I am dyslexic, the monitor poses a challenge for me. My crutch became my noose. It made my presentation worse.
My other problem was that my intention was off. Vince had said something that surprised me. While encouraging me between services, he explained that he wanted me to make sure that I covered all of the announcements, but what was more important to him was the likeability factor. He said he would rather I miss an announcement and be likeable than get the content perfect and be seen as unlikeable by the congregation. Verve is for people new to the idea of God, so the first impression is critical. Vince said that if they saw me as likeable, they would be more likely to come back. Even though I was only the host, it matters. It affects people’s perception of the whole church.
Duh! That’s what I teach: “Be present, not perfect.” It was a dose of my own medicine. Though my intent was to be sure that I said everything I was supposed to, that should not have been my most important concern. If you are, or wish to be, a professional speaker, the event planner’s intention is the one you and I have to meet. Vince’s goals for me were to be likeable first and to get all the announcements right second. Point taken.
Some presenters say the correct words, but the audience can sense a lack of connection. For you and me, our ability to be likeable on stage has a direct impact on the validity of our takeaway message and our rehire rate.
A funny side note is that I had given that same feedback to Vince about another host months ago. Be careful giving feedback; you just might get that job. I then got the opportunity and made the same mistake myself. Ouch.
I see two important lessons here. First, we need to align our preparation with our event planners’ intentions. Their desired result is the one we need to make happen. If you are not clear about what they are looking for, it is your responsibility to ask.
Second, we need to be connected and present in order to be likeable. If we are inside our heads searching for memorized words or reading a confidence monitor, we can hurt our likeability. Whether you have the privilege of an audience for free or are getting the big bucks, your event planner may not be as forgiving as my pastor.
How likeable are you on stage? Share your comments below!
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